About my serious side

Not to break the spell or spoil the fun, but you've probably figured out my real name isn't Dummy.

The CTD Diaries is my playground. No one tells the truth in their diaries anyway so I figured I should find another place to get real, where the head lights aren't so bright. I originally thought this would be a good place to post my creative writing, but I think this is just a good place to tell the truth.

Friday, August 14, 2009

My girl'z got guts!

Remember my super model daughter?  

Well she had a room.  In Hawaii.

And this is how I will always remember it.

I took these pictures last Sunday before she left on a jet plane to fly away to Utah.  


This ceiling fan was the only thing I enjoyed trashing IMMENSELY, since it was really good at giving us an earful of noise, but not so good at giving us any AIR FLOW.

Ba Bye celing fan.

"Mom, you're so emotional!" My daughter said as we were pulling out of the driveway to take her to the airport. 

Good thing she didn't see me taking all these pictures.  

Or sitting on her bed for the last time watching her sleep earlier that morning. 

"Bye house," she said as we pulled out of the driveway. 

"Bye townhouses," she said as we drove down the street. 

"Bye BYU." 

"Bye Laie." 

"Bye beach." 

That's when I turned around and smacked her upside the head.  And she stopped. 

This is my daughter's room now.


I miss my daughter!!!!

And her room!!!! 


(I know families are forever, but my heart aches for anyone who loses a child too soon.)

One of the last nights she was here I sprawled out on her bed with her and did something we've never done together before.  Watched CSI.  Or was it Bones.  Or was it Cold Case?  Or L.A. Ink? I can't remember.  I don't love any of those shows.  But we were together.  On her bed.  In her room.  For the last time. 

My hub kept calling for me to come look at some house on the internet, but I just ignored him, because when you're about to finish a really good book, you want to savor the ending.  Even if ends with CSI. 

My daughter left for Utah a week before us so she could start practicing with her new High School soccer team.

She started practicing 3 hours after she arrived, (which wasn't easy because we don't do red blood cells in Hawaii.)  

And then she played in her first varsity game the next day.  

And we missed it. 

Because we're still in Hawaii stuffing the last 10 years into polite little boxes.  

We talk every day and I ask her how she's doing. 

"I can't breathe, but I'm fine," she says.   

Not only is she a super model she's a super trooper.  I can't imagine at 14 years old--moving away, without your fam, a new high school, a team of strangers,  3 hour practices every day.  

And NO AIR! 

At least she's got GUTS! 

LY daughter of mine!  

Thinking of you (and all your friends).

And thinking of you (and all your soccer girlz).

Can't wait to see you next week!